Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. {2} Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is -- his good, pleasing and perfect will. -- Romans 12:1-2
We guarantee it. Being a part of a Friendship Group will bring tremendous benefits to you and your family. The kind of blessings you can't buy with money, or maybe even find anywhere else. But let's be honest. Even if Friendship Groups at New Life are great, just the thought of being committed to a small group of people may produce some mixed feelings. We know what you're thinking. Many of us at New Life have asked the same questions you might be asking:
"When do we have time? Johnny has Cub Scouts three nights a week, little Suzy has dance lessons two nights a week, and I'll die without Monday Night Football!"
"What if I don't really "click" with any of these people? Will I really fit in?"
"What do I need more friends for? Between my family and work mates, I've got all the relationships I need, more than I want sometimes!”
"I'm not going to have to do some of that "male bonding" stuff or anything am I?"
"What if I have to be open? I mean if I keep a "respectable" distance then I'll stay "respectable". If people really get to know me, they might not like what they find out."
The Real Question is How Much Do You Love God
All of these would be legitimate questions if... if you were not a Christian. As a child in God's family, the Father has certain expectations of your life. There is no greater privilege on earth than to be called a child of God, yet we must not forget the responsibilities that go with such a high calling. Our Father has been very clear in communicating His most important expectations of how you are to live in His Family with your brothers and sisters. The relationships we have with our spiritual siblings is a critical issue for the Father. In fact He's even kind of blunt about it:
"... anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And He has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother." (1
God measures our love for Him by measuring how much we are giving and sharing our lives with other precious people of God. Nothing thrills the heart of our Father more than to see real fellowship among Christian brothers and sisters. That's why in the New Testament alone, there are over 100 "one another" or "each other" verses. As you read through the following sampling of our Father's instructions, ask yourself this question: "How could I ever possibly obey these commands without being committed to a small group of Christians? The answer will be obvious: You can't.
Authentic Christianity in God’s Word
"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." (Rom 12:10)
"But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness." (Heb 3:13)
"And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching." (Heb 10:24-25)
"Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling." (1 Pet 4:9)
"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." (John 13:34-35)
"My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. (John 15:12-14)
"You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love." (Gal 5:13)
"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." (Eph 4:32)
"Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus" (Phil 2:2-5)
"Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God." (
"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." (1 Th 5:11)
"Keep on loving each other as brothers." (Heb 13:1)
"Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble." (1 Pet 3:8)
"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth." (1
There are plenty more, but hopefully these will do. Can you believe how much God expects your life to be wrapped up in the lives of other Christians? God is trying with all His might to describe what real Christianity is... Authentic Christianity. Not the fake stuff made up of just meetings and marketing, buildings and Bible studies. Yes, even Bible studies. Please remember that none of our first century brothers and sisters even had Bibles, yet they will always be our very best example of Authentic Christianity. Why? Not because of the amount of their Bible knowledge, but because of the closeness of their relationships. God promises that “love builds up” (1 Corinthians 8:1). It’s the kind of Christianity that makes you and those around you an indispensable and intimate part of each other's lives.
Now That's a Scary Thought
You might be thinking: “People have problems. And if my life is hooked up with their life, that means their problems will become my problems.” Yeah, but here's an even scarier thought: Your problems might become their problems! That's right. Sharing your life with others may mean that they share the ups and downs of your life with you. Nnnowww you're starting to get the picture! J Now you're beginning to understand what Christ meant when He said for the umpteen zillionth time, "Love one another as I have loved you". Indeed, Christ gave up everything in His life for us, but He also shared His difficulties, distresses and disappointments with those around Him. When it comes to Authentic Christianity, sharing our life is just as important (and maybe harder) than giving our life.
We Americans love to give, but we hate to share. Here’s what we mean. When someone is truly in need, most of us have little problem giving our time and money to help. This is a virtue that we should never lose. But sharing our life is an equally essential virtue that we know little about. How often do we share our personal concerns with others and ask them to pray for us? It seems at times that we practically need to be on our death bed before we are willing to share our life with others. How often have you shared a decision (big or little) with another Christian in order to get their counsel? Have you ever confessed a sin to a brother or sister in Christ so they could help you?
Noooooo. We're too American. We're too proud and independent. When God pulls the curtain on this show we call life, He isn't going to be asking us if we were an authentic American. He will be asking if we were an Authentic Christian. There is no way that we can live our lives as God intended without finding some other Christians to share our lives with. Even families were never intended to be an island, but to be intimately connected with the rest of the Christian Family and Body through sharing their life with other Christian families. This, and nothing short of it, is Authentic Christianity. This is the way it was meant to be. And only through small extended families of Christians like Friendship Groups will we ever have it.
Perfection Not Allowed
That's not to say that Authentic Christianity is easy. If it was, more would be experiencing it. But many of us at New Life can tell you that it is easily worth the effort. Authentic Christianity is not free of problems, stresses, and inconveniences either. As disappointing as it may be, you won't find a perfect Friendship Group at New Life. The singing might be dreadfully off key, it might be your turn to care for everyone's kids, and the treat afterwards may be one of those yucky tasting "health" foods. But no matter. Authentic Christianity has nothing to do with perfection or convenience. Real Christianity is being real with a real God and real people. In fact, the imperfections you will encounter in a Friendship Group will actually make it even more authentic.
Christianity is a Team Sport
It's a given. Sharing your life with others has its risks. But please ponder for just a moment the risks of not participating in Authentic Christianity. Why is the divorce rate for Christians not much different than anyone else? Why are Christian families experiencing just as much discontentment, disillusionment and discouragement as the rest of Americans? Why do we have so much difficulty passing on our Christian values to our children? Why isn't the Christian life fun anymore? It's because there is so little Authentic Christianity!
In fact, God the Father desires Authentic Christianity so much, that He made sure you will fail miserably as a Christian without it. God made Authentic Christianity a team sport. Americans play it like solitaire. You can be an American Christian and remain solo, but understand this: You will never be an Authentic Christian until you join a team. You can join a church, you can join a Bible study, you can even join a prayer group, but if you never devote yourself to a small group of Christians as if they were your very own family, you will not have Authentic Christianity.
Try playing football by yourself sometime. It's not possible is it? Neither is Authentic Christianity. If you're not going to let others into your huddle don't even get on the field. God is opposed to the proud and you're sure to lose (Pr. 3:34,
Our 1st Century Example
Earlier we mentioned the fact that the Christians in the first century of the Church were amazing examples of Authentic Christianity. They lived the Christian life the way God intended it to be so that we, even almost 2000 years later, could follow their example. What did they do? We catch a glimpse of what Authentic Christianity was like in the early Church in the verse quoted above from
They Were Devoted
Verse 42 begins by telling us, "They were devoted..." The Greek word here is "proskartereo", meaning to persist, be strong in. Elsewhere the word is translated "give their full time to" (Romans 13:6). In the Greek Old Testament, we see the word translated in the
This is the most critical thing we must decide for ourselves and our family. What will be our level of commitment to the Family of God. In American Christianity, the Family of God is just a part of your life. Sure we go to church on Sunday and maybe even a Bible study during the week, but the rest of the week is "ours". Participation in the church is made up of meetings that we show up at so we can claim commitment. This is not what God ever intended for His Family.
Authentic Christianity is an everyday lifestyle. If our relationship with God and His Family is only an isolated part of our weekly schedule, we are not experiencing Authentic Christianity. We've already said it. You and your family need to decide whether you want American Christianity or Authentic Christianity. If American Christianity is the standard by which we judge our lives, we will never even come close to God's brand of Christianity.
Jesus pointed out almost 2000 years ago what keeps many American Christians from becoming Authentic Christians. He said, "Do not store up for yourselves treasure on earth... but store up for yourselves treasure in heaven" (Matthew 6:19-20). He said, "You cannot serve both God and Money" (6:24). He said, "Do not worry about your life... the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well". (6:32-33) It's our preoccupation with all our "stuff"! It's not just our "stuff" necessarily, but the fact that our lives evolve around it. Getting it, using it, and keeping it.
Much of our "stuff" may be necessary, but Christ warned us, "Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions." The life of an American Christian often consists of his or her devotion to their "stuff". The life of an Authentic Christian will consist of their devotion to their friendships: With God and others.
What was Authentic Christianity like for these people in the first Church? Was it boring? God says they were "filled with awe". Was it just church on Sunday? God says, "Every day they continued to meet together" and "they ate together... in their homes". Were they slouches at work or isolating themselves from the rest of society? God says they, "enjoyed the favor of all the people". Was it worth it? God says these people had "glad hearts". You will never meet a more committed bunch of people. Nor will you meet a more fulfilled, happy, and respected group of people. We can so easily shy away from commitment, but we forget the incredible blessings God can bring our way when we are committed to the right things. There is no better way to live your life.
We are not implying that all of us at New Life are living this way. But there is nothing we desire more. We're still in pursuit of recapturing Authentic Christianity in twentieth-century
Authentic Christianity is...
...when your family is wondering what to do on one of those rare "free" nights and the first thing that comes to mind is taking a half gallon of Rocky Road ice cream over to someone in your Friendship Group and sharing it with them. And nobody cares one little bit about what their house looks like!
...when you share that home improvement project with the rest of the guys in your Friendship Group, and then the next weekend you're helping someone else with theirs.
...when you get a job offer to go to another city, but decide to stay for fear that you will never find another family of God's people like the one you've found here.
...when everyone else’s kids in your Friendship Group put "Uncle" or "Aunt" in front of your name.
Authentic Christianity is when tragedy strikes (and it does more often than we'd like to think) and you know there will be some people who hurt as much as you do. Do you need a place to stay? You've got it. Do you need some money? You've got it. Do you need someone who will care for your kids as if they were their very own? You've got it. Do you need an arm around your shoulder or a squeezed hand and a smile? You've got it. Whatever you need, God will use these people to provide it. That's the way He wants it. In fact, God loves Authentic Christianity so much, He will allow hardship, difficulties, and the persecution of His people just so the world can witness what Authentic Christianity looks like. But we don't have to wait for a tragedy. Authentic Christianity can happen right now.
When will you begin your adventure in Authentic Christianity? You can go to Sunday morning service every week, show up for all the church picnics, and even serve in some ministry. But you will never find Authentic Christianity in any of these by themselves. At
Before going on to what we actually do in Friendship Groups, there is one more benefit that we would like to point out. It is an additional blessing that you will experience if you commit to being a vital member in a Friendship Group family at New Life.
A Lasting Gift for Your Children
Have you ever known anyone who had Christian parents but they never really saw them living it? Maybe it was your parents. Oh, they went to church, but really when you think about it, they resembled American Christians more than Authentic Christians. You never saw dad pray except maybe at the dinner table. Did you ever see Him worship God in song outside of the church building? Was the very heart and soul of your family connected to other families in a bond that remains unbroken to this day? Or did you just kind of do your own thing?
The most valuable thing you can impart to your children is Authentic Christianity. Do you want them to really be ready to excel in this life when you let them go? Give them Authentic Christianity. Do you want to give them the best vaccine possible to immunize them from the diseases of the soul which are devouring American (and Christian) youth? Start them now in Authentic Christianity. It's American Christianity that leaves a bad taste in their mouth, just like it did for us. Kids and teens yearn for Authentic Christianity. Let them see their parents living it now.
Let them join you singing to God in somebody's living room. Let them hear you tell your peers what God taught you in your Bible reading this week. Let them see you listening to the prayer requests of a friend, bowing your head, and talking to your Father who is in heaven. You will not give your children a more valuable gift than Authentic Christianity. And because of what Authentic Christianity is, you need a Friendship Group to give it to them. There is no other way. Not to give them Authentic Christianity.